What you fear controls you. If you are afraid of dying alone, you are binding yourself tighter in this knot. You are thinking too much. Be like the honey badger. Just dont give a shit. Relax and things will start to change naturally. Learn to relax. Thinking is overrated.
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"What is here is there. What is not here is nowhere." Vishvasara Tantra
"Ever tried, Ever Failed. No matter. Try Again.
Fail Again. Fail Better. Samuel Beckett