Below is an actual police report from the Mason police department. The LSJ will publish occasional blotter items from around the region that are newsy, quirky or humorous.
Mason Police Department

January 1 - A Mason resident called to report receiving subliminal messages he detected while watching a pornographic movie purchased in Jackson.

The complainant replayed the portion of the DVD in slow motion for the officer, who did note four words he could read and a series of other words that passed so quickly they could not be read.

The complainant stated he reported the incident only because he had read where Al Qaeda was inserting messages into pornographic movies.

The Department has since learned Al Qaeda is not the only purveyor of subliminal messaging through pornographic movies and that this is also an outlaw gang-related tactic.

 

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i need to verify this...SEND ME ALL YOUR PORN!

 

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that explains my sudden urge to bang a goat.

Do you kill yourself as an unclean heathen pig or catch the nearest airplane into a building?

 

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what could Al-Q POSSIBLY be sticking in porn for subliminal messages?

BE BACK LATER HUN, JUST WATCHED SOME PORN AND I HAVE A HANKERING TO BOMB AN ARMY RECRUITMENT CENTER!

 

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That explains the weird boners I get when someone quotes the Quran, anyway...

 

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Ya, you're all welcome.

That guy sounds like a natural to work for the TSA.

whatisthisidonteven...